I think it's probably because it's a default condition rather than something that's carefully considered that this woman saw it as wrong. "Everyone" does it, so if someone doesn't do it, they must be abnormal, must be off somehow. That said, you're absolutely right that this position doesn't bear up under any scrutiny at all. I remember a conversation with a guy I was close friends with growing up when he had his first child. I said I couldn't imagine having children at our age (we were in our early 20s) because I didn't feel financially secure enough to raise children, much less actually ready to take on the vast responsibility of raising a child. Both because of his situation as a new father and because of his religious conviction, my position seemed completely foreign to him. A child was more of a blessing from God than something that you would plan. Which only makes sense to him, I suppose, being one of ten children.

I think most people just expect other people to want to have children. If they don't, they find this odd or strange, not everyone is made for having families though. My sister decided to not have children because she said she was too selfish, not being able to put the kids needs ahead of her own. I don't find her odd or strange, well other than normal sisterly things.

My wife and I are child free by choice. There is nothing mentally wrong with either of us. Fortunately, we don't get this kind of comment directed at us. Anyone who did would feel the acid edge of my tongue.

I certainly don't think there's anything *wrong* with someone for not having children, but I doubt I could be in a long term relationship with someone who doesn't, simply because I don't think anyone without children could fully understand me. It's not really any different from the fact that I can't envision myself in a relationship with a Republican. Nothing personal. Just need to have those few things in common.

For me and my husband the choice was somewhat taken away from us due to some health issues on my part. At one time we thought we wanted to have children and went thru the torture of infertility testing and surgery to correct the problem. Since it didn’t work we remained childless. On one hand I was grateful; I don’t think I was ever “ready” to be a mother to humans. We have been able to pass on the love and nurturing feelings to our dogs, but I have days when I think “Who will take care of me when I am old?” Then I realize having children would have never guaranteed some one to be there when we are old.

I think it is admirable admission when a man or woman is clear on how they stand when it comes to children. If they feel they are not ready to have children, or have no desire to have children, that is their right. Nowadays, a woman really does have a choice whether or not they want to conceive or carry a pregnancy to term...aka birthcontrol (whether by pill or less savory means). That might sound horrid, but in America, at least, women do not have to be pregnant. We should count ourselves lucky (in a sense) that we live in a world and in a time where it is NOT mandatory to produce offspring. Personally, I will never have children, by choice and due to health complications, but I relish the fact that I HAVE a choice in the matter. But I suppose there will always be people in the world who seem to spontaneously have children only to neglect or abuse these children, or take for granted the fact that they can have children. I think this woman you mentioned, W, is still living in her socially assigned role of a closed-minded peon.

I read a book back in college called Pronatalism: The Myth of Mom and Apple Pie which was essentially about all of the societal pressures to have children and a defense of the right not to have them. There really are a lot of pressures out there and so many people never become conscious of them. That said, I do think that it's becoming a more common choice, is losing some of its stigma, and is therefore actully becoming a choice for more and more people.

I think it's disgusting to think that there would be a "stigma" attached to not having children, although I don't doubt those of you who suggest that there has been. We should all have the same freedoms to choose for ourselves, and this is often not a choice, but a fact of nature. It would be a terrible shame to hold that against someone. I think we should all value each other's paths, always, and in everything. I just can't imagine being in an intimate long-term relationship with someone who didn't have children - mostly because I can't imagine them putting up with my obsession with my own. Sherck, if anyone gives you a hard time about being childless, send 'em to me and I'll whoop up on 'em for you. ;)

I think that woman's perspective is very odd. I must say that when people insist too adamantly that others make the same life-style choices as they do, that's really about not being 100% comfortable with their own choices. They seem to seek validation in others being like them.